The Real Self

After reading this two chapters, I am surprising that the solitude and loneliness is different. Loneliness is the situation that you are uncomfortable with other yourself, but the solitude is different. Solitude is stratify with self. Sometimes I feel lonely even I’m with my friends. They asked me why I love using social media. I just answered that sometimes I feel alone. If I feel lonely, I open the social media, and post something on it. This makes me feel relaxed for a while, then the anxious begins again. I feel so bad with this feelings. After a long time, I feel more depressed when I keep looking at the Facebook or other social medias.

Every time before the class start, I feel anxious without talking to my classmates. Therefore, I take out my phone and chat with my friend who are not in this room. Like “The Facebook Zone” in chapter “Solitude” says, “Sometimes when you’re just sitting and talking to someone or in class it ’s boring. So you check your phone even if you know nothing has happened. That switching makes it so that when you’re just sitting or engaged in one thing, it feels weird.” I feel wired when I do not talk to anyone else in this classroom, so I turn to my phone. It’s like I’m not participating one thing and never let myself be solitude.

Last week, I tried to not play my phone before the class started. My classmate came to me and asked some questions about the homework. It was a great change of me. This makes me feel that I am connected with my classmates. I feel happy after that class. I think this is a good beginning of being solitude.

On page 83, this book mentioned that Melissa wrote a “aspirational self” profile on her Facebook page, and this chapter also mentioned about people only publish what they want to post on their website. This makes me think of my friend. I have a friend who has a part time job in Australia. On her Facebook page, she goes to bars and parties every weekend. She looks happy there. One year later, we had a lunch together, she talked about her life in Australia was bad. I was surprised because I have never seen she complained on her Facebook page. She said she only posted the good news on her Facebook page even though she had a hard time in there. I found that people who are looked glamorous online, it does not mean they are so good in their real lives. It’s just like the book says, “Melissa wrote a pleasing profile for Facebook, one that reflected the person she wanted to be, her aspirational self.” Therefore, it is hard to know someone else from his or her Facebook profile.

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